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Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Pursuing a Healthier Me

This is going to be a hard post for me to write, I can feel it already. Not because I don’t know what to say, but because I’m going to be completely raw and honest and open about my weight loss journey and struggle. I've shared on my blog plenty of times my goals for exercising and eating. I've shared when I've felt both defeats and victories along the way. But through it all, I've been kind of ambiguous of actual numbers and goals and specifics. Today that changes, because today I want to bare it all! So here comes the full story of my weight loss journey. And I do mean full story. So grab a seat, and a glass of water, and maybe a snack, and get comfy...

I think I was pretty “normal-sized” up until middle school probably. And then I was just a little chubby. In high school, I was still gaining a little bit, but wasn't too bad yet. I was a cheerleader from 8th-12th grades, and so I was always really physical and active with that. I don’t know exactly how much I weighed, but my guess somewhere between 175 throughout most of those four years, and maybe 190 or so by graduation.

June 2006, right after high school grad. Prob around 190 or so.

Then in college I guess things started getting out of hand. I wasn't cheering anymore, and so I was far less active than I had been. I was also eating crappy dining hall food a lot, and even crappier dorm food. Eventually I started working at Chick-fil-A, and I mean hello – they’re food is so yummy, so of course I ate that a lot. Once I moved into my own apartment, I would cook for myself, but I wasn't really worrying about trying to fix healthy meals or anything. And I was still gaining weight, without really even realizing it much.

I did a few active things so I wasn't completely sedentary, like occasional bike rides and swimming, but it wasn't really enough. I also had an at-home work out DVD of a "Dancing With the Stars" routine that was quite fun, and of course entertaining for my roommates :) My fall semester of senior year, my roommate Bridget and I started going to the gym at our complex once a week or so. But I wasn't motivated at all. Spring semester of senior year, we started doing zumba on campus twice a week, and I freaking loved it! It was such a great work out, it was fun, and I got to do it with a big group of my girl friends too. And now I had started trying to eat a little healthier and be more conscious of what I put into my body. It wasn't anything drastic, but it was a small start…

When I graduated college in April 2010, I weighed 227 pounds. I think before that semester though, I was probably somewhere around 230-235, but I didn't have a scale then so I’m not sure. All I know is I had definitely lost a few pounds that year going to the gym and zumba, so I know I must have been at least 230 at my heaviest.

April 2010, right before college grad. Probably around 230 pounds or so...

In August 2010, I went on an amazing road trip with some of my best girl friends. We had a great time, traveled to and through about 15 states, and did so many fun things! However, we tried to hike a mountain trail in Tennessee, and I could barely make it. I kept having to stop and rest, and it took me about ten minutes longer to reach the top than it took the other girls. I was shaky and out of breath, and obviously out of shape. I knew then that I finally had to make some real changes! And then looking at pictures of the trip, I hated how round my face was, and how my features all kind of melted away behind the fatness in my face. I finally had to admit I was fat. And I didn't like it.

August 2010, on the Great American Road Trip, somewhere around 225-230

 So September of 2010, I finally started to do something about it! I started on the Slim Fast plan and ate it for breakfast and lunch, with some healthy snacks throughout the day, and then one real meal for dinner time. And I started walking around my neighborhood by myself and with my family a couple times a week. I did this pretty religiously for a few months, and by December 1, 2010, I was at 217 pounds. And then I found a place to start zumba here in Tallahassee! And then I got really serious.

I was very good about what I ate, and was always trying to find the healthier options when possible. I continued to go to zumba twice a week, and did whatever else I could. My goal was to get under 200 pounds before Easter of that year, 2011. And I did it! I kept up my good work, and kept pushing at it. I was motivated and I was on a roll. By August 2011, I was at my lowest that I could actually remember, of 192 pounds. At that point, I had lost 35 pounds!! I was ecstatic. I was wearing clothes a bit smaller (and a smaller bra size- holler!), I could actually tell I looked so much better, my face was thinner, my arms were toning out, and my legs were leaner.

Summer 2011. Probably around 195 pounds. (If you're confused - I'm in the teal shirt and jean shorts.)

Summer 2011. Somewhere around 193-194 pounds. And look at those legs!

I was starting to like the way I looked a whole lot more than before. And I had met a cute boy in May :)

August 2011. First trip with Jeff to St. Augustine!

Then in August 2011, Jeff and I started getting really serious. And I stopped caring as much about my diet! All I wanted to do was hang out with this cute boy – not work out or worry about what I ate. And so hang out with this cute boy I did. We went out to eat and I got whatever I wanted, and we went to movies and ate popcorn with soda, and I just stopped caring quite as much. And things started to slip. And I started gaining the weight back. Then in February 2012, I went to the doctor and found out I was 212 pounds – I had no idea I had gained that much. And I was obviously upset.

So I started making a few small changes, but just barely at all. At the beginning of April 2012, I was at 207, and I was ready to get serious again. I did two weeks of no-carbs, and lost 7 pounds in two weeks, to be right at 200. I tried a couple of other options, workouts and diets throughout the summer, and got down to about 196 in August 2012. But then in September, we went to Rock the Universe and I ate all sorts of awful, unhealthy food, and that kicked me off on another phase of not caring so much. Then, I was around 205 by the end of the month.

September 2012. Right under 200, probably around 198 pounds.

I stopped going to zumba, but was trying to run a couple times a week, at least for about a month or so. Then I quit running. And then once again, I quit caring so much about what I ate. And then we went through the holiday seasons of Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas, and I hardly thought twice about what I ate. Now there were definitely times where I made healthy choices and tried to eat the right thing. But it wasn't enough - nowhere near enough. And I hardly exercised at all from mid-October until the New Year.

And so to start off 2013, I weighed in at 217. I was a little devastated. Once again, I had no idea how much I had gained back. But this awful number on the scale has kick started my motivation again! I've started going to zumba again twice a week, I’m doing the 30-Day Shred twice a week at home, and I’m currently doing the Daniel Fast. I’m motivated and I’m ready, and I’m determined. I’m done with the ups and downs of my weight, and I’m ready to lose the weight for good, and learn how to keep it that way!

I've only been at this for a little over a week (today is day 9), but now I’m at 210 pounds – seven pounds lighter this year already. And I’m ready for more to melt off! My goal is to be under 200 by March, and to be hopefully 180-185 by my sister’s wedding, May 18th. I know it’s a lot to lose. I am very aware of that. But it’s got to go! It’s time to do this right, and be well on my journey. Then past that, I would like to eventually make it to 167 pounds by the end of this year, which would be 60 pounds lost total since this whole thing started in September 2010.

Me -- today! (In the bathroom at work, in one of my fav dresses...) At 210 pounds.

I know I can do this! The time is now! I’m motivated, determined and inspired. But I need friends and family to encourage and support me. I need them to hold me accountable, and help me make good eating decisions, and push me to work out even when I don’t want to. I know I can’t do this alone. I know I need help and support, and then I know I will succeed!!

I hope you guys didn't fall asleep reading all of this. I do thank you for letting me share it with you. I think it will prove to be both therapeutic for me and a motivator as well! It’s scary sharing such personal details, but I think it will be good for me in the long run. Be prepared for more updates and stuff in the future as this progresses forward! And feel free to leave encouragement, tips, recipes or links in the comments that might be helpful! :)

29 comments:

Peanut Butter Pie said...

You can do this! I'll be praying for you along the way :)

-Emily

Unknown said...

I feel like I relate to you in so many ways! You can do this! And I will be sending encouraging thoughts two states away for you to continue to do good :)
xoxo,
Laura

www.notyourskinnybitch.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

You can do it! Losing weight is hard and frustrating and annoying as hell, but the end results are always soooo worth it. What makes it even harder is having a job where you sit all day. Job shopping? Love you and proud of you!

ricci said...

You can do it!!!!

Ryan said...

I'm rooting for you, girl! I know how hard it is - I struggled all of last year and lost 55 pounds, and it was the best feeling in the world! (Obviously I'm gaining it all back now with this pregnancy, but here's hoping I'll be motivated to get it back off once April rolls around!) You can do it!! :)

Kimberly H said...

You can do it! My weight loss struggles/story are actually very similar to yours - except I was super active in college (marching band) and have gained since I stopped that a year and a half ago. I've always struggled with my weight, but it's gotten much worse since I finished band. I know that 2013 will be our year! We can do it!!

Jennifer M. said...

What a brave post! I'm really proud if you for sharing it and asking for people to be alongside you. I'll definitely be your cheerleader and I love you so much! You got this!

Happy Bean said...

This gave me goosebunmps!! First of all, you look SO cute today - loving the shoes. Second, I am so proud of you! I know exactly what you're talking about when it comes to falling in love and gaining some pounds. Boyfriend and I actually got a gym membership together and haven't gone once. You have totally inspired me though to be more active and eat more healthy! Amazing!!

Jen@runfortheboys said...

You can do this! Come run with me sometime :-)

SouthAsiaRocks said...

You're a Rockstar!!! You can do this!!!

Kimmyyy83 said...

You can do this girl!!! if you go to my blog www.thethingaboutdesiny.com we do a wednesday weight link up. great girls there! way smarter than me about this stuff :-)

She's a big star said...

Definitely didn't fall asleep reading this! You're so brave opening up and sharing your story... I loved reading it and can't wait to share in your journey! You're definitely motivating!!

Unknown said...

thanks for linking up! I've been in the yo-yo stage...I'm there now! I look forward to following along with you through the link up each week!!! :)

Emily Carnes said...

I'm so glad you shared this today--thanks for being so honest! You look great, and good things are coming. :)

Mom said...

This is awesome, Halie! You're doing great! Keep it up and keep smiling! :)

Unknown said...

Your mom is right to be proud of you. That was a courageous post. You have proven you can do it. Scream out like and addict when you feel like you are slipping and feeling lax. We will hold you accountable. Remind yourself our bodies are the Temple. We should be creating a healthy dwelling for the Spirit. I am one to talk, since I am very over weight. I am going to stay connected with you and hope you inspire me. My health prohibits the exercise, but a healthy diet is go for all of us.
God bless you. You are in my prayers. Peggy

Amy said...

Can't wait to follow you on your journey! You can do this!

Sarah said...

What a great post! Good luck with your goals--sounds like you're doing great so far! :o)

Anonymous said...

I finally got to read it all lol.

Thank you for sharing! It helps me to know I am not the only one that has lost and gained the same pounds back because I kept "falling off the wagon". I too am going to make 2013 my year and lose the weight once and for all. I am struggling to stay motivated and have not really lost any pounds so far this year. I will definitely be following along with your journey for motivation and inspiration.

Again, thank you for sharing! It helps more than just you. :)

Unknown said...

I'll be following your progress and you can follow mine! I do weight loss Wednesdays on my blog. Esther Norine designs

Sarah said...

I found your blog on the weigh in link up! We are around the same weight so I'm excited to share this journey with you! Check out my blog if you have a chance.

Liss said...

First I want to say your awesome. Takes a lot of guts to write this. I have struggled with my wieght for a long time. I was down to healthier size then I too met a cute boy and well I got all fat and happy. Now I vow this year to be healthy and happy. I just followed your blog so I can follow your journey. Good Luck and God Bless. =)

Lauren Thomas said...

Girl, you got this! I did the Daniel Fast last year and I was completely amazed at how different I felt by not eating the nasty processed food. That's why we've incorporated that into our actual diet that is sustainable. We could totes be BFFs....I mean seriously, have you read all my weighty posts? ;)

StyleShoezandSass said...

Halie, I commend you on your courage of sharing something so personal to you. It speaks volumes about your character and shows tremendous cetermination on your part. You can do this and you deserve it. Good Luck and go get'em!!
XOXO

Amy Powell said...

that was a great, brave, story to tell! thank you for sharing!

and good luck girl :)

xoxo, Amy @ Interpret As You May

SMD @ lifeaccordingtosteph said...

Kudos for putting yourself out there.

I'm in a similar boat - I was down 20 pounds and gained almost all of it back. I've gone back to the gym and doing home workouts and have started writing down what I eat again.

You can do this! And so can I.

Laura Breunig said...

I loved this post! I know how hard it is to be honest about weight issues. I wish you luck and I'll be praying for you!

Laura

Megan said...

Halez- just caught up on your blog (I know I was waaay behind) and I'm so proud of you! You are one of the most gorgeous people I know (100% honest- if I only had your eyes!) and I think if anyone can do it- it's you! And I think you're an inspiration for so many others, including me, who have been wanting to lose weight but don't know where to start. Love you girl!

Jodi Runs & Stuff said...

Hi there! Our stories are so similar, right down to our highest weight(and the panhandle of FL). I know how you feel with the up and down on the scale, it can be so discouraging. It's always nice to know you're not alone. I wish all the best with your weight loss!
http://www.13point1milestodisney.com/